Blowing out someones candles won't make yours shine any brighter.

Stop hating.

Life has its up's and downs, just a matter of how you take it. 
You get all emotional and tense about it? 
you go with the flow of things?
Or You think about it, yet choose to not get caught up in it?
I chose to go with the flow.
It sometimes hurts, but well doesn't everything to everyone?

Others though, got too caught up in it. Too caught up in my life.
People know that my days may be numbered.
But you don't have to remind me everyday, I do what I do to forget.
Not for you to remind me.
Not like I wouldn't remember the fact that I'm dying.

Though, I can't seem to make sense of what difference would it make?
Inside, I died at birth. 
I may be breathing, but I'm not breathing.
Feeling but not knowing what emotions are.
Thinking yet without a concience.

Ironic isn't it?
Trying to save a life, that doesn't want saving.
I'm not saying i want to die.
I'm saying that I'm not afraid of death.

Ironic isn't it?
That when word gets out that one person is dying, everyone else seems to reveal a deep dark secret that they're dying too.
Just proves that everyone, including me. 
We're all selfish in different ways.
We all lie.
We all have secrets.
We all feel uncared for, though the people closest to us care.
We all have made mistakes.
We've all felt like there couldn't be anything worse.


Truth is, no matter what happens....
There's always someone who's got it better, and someone who's got it worse.
Be grateful for that, even though It may just be the bitter truth.

If the world ended today, would you be proud of yourself?

sayonara,

M .

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

Lesson of the day. -drunken words are sober thoughts-

“Life lives, life dies. Life laughs, life cries. Life gives up and life tries. But life looks different through everyone's eyes.”

Now that some people know.
People are starting to act differently.
People I once knew oh-so well, don't tell me things anymore, in fact you seem to barely talk to me.
You keep saying no one cares.
So why the hell do you think I stayed back those days?
I could have caught some sleep if I just went home cause I didnt care.
I may not care, but I care.
You get me?!
you dont. no one does.

I've tried. I really have.
You just don't know how it feels like.
To feel like a plastic bag, drifting through the wind, wanting to start again.
You don't know how it feels like being me.

Promises mean everything when you're little,And the worlds so big.

I miss those days. I really do. When no one knew anything. But now people know, its getting worse. I just don't know what to do. If only grandma was here, she would give me a hug and tell me no matter what everything will be alright. Henry would just kick my ass and be all, your an idiot.

The times when life didn't seem so difficult.
You stopped telling me things. It just seems like to you, everythings a mess, to me everything was always a mess. At least, we live here, we have foood, we go to school right?
Unlike the less fortunate people, no food. no school.
That's what I try to think about all the time. How lucky I am.
But how lucky am I really?

Sometimes you just got to deal with it.
Deal with shit.
When shit happens, 
sometimes you get constipation. 
WhatamIcrapping?

It's hard to let my words out.
Sorry.

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

Now that some people know.
People are starting to act differently.
People I once knew oh-so well, don't tell me things anymore, in fact you seem to barely talk to me.
You keep saying no one cares.
So why the hell do you think I stayed back those days?
I could have caught some sleep if I just went home cause I didnt care.
I may not care, but I care.
You get me?!
you dont. no one does.

I've tried. I really have.
You just don't know how it feels like.
To feel like a plastic bag, drifting through the wind, wanting to start again.
You don't know how it feels like being me.

Promises mean everything when you're little,And the worlds so big.

I miss those days. I really do. When no one knew anything. But now people know, its getting worse. I just don't know what to do. If only grandma was here, she would give me a hug and tell me no matter what everything will be alright. Henry would just kick my ass and be all, your an idiot.

The times when life didn't seem so difficult.
You stopped telling me things. It just seems like to you, everythings a mess, to me everything was always a mess. At least, we live here, we have foood, we go to school right?
Unlike the less fortunate people, no food. no school.
That's what I try to think about all the time. How lucky I am.
But how lucky am I really?

Sometimes you just got to deal with it.
Deal with shit.
When shit happens, 
sometimes you get constipation. 
WhatamIcrapping?

It's hard to let my words out.
Sorry.

sayonara,

M .

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

Wrote a song. :)
-drunken words are sober thoughts-

I think I'm going to Private my blog. 
So only certain people can read.

I don't know why is it, that when people think about Pyshopaths or Sosiopaths or those kind of things, the words that go into their brains is,
-Insane
-Murderer
- Dangerous
- Person in those white pillowed room kinda of a thing.

Been researching on those kind of things lately.
Let's just say, they've caught my attention.
And leave it at that.
No questions asked.

These people are humans too you know.
They're just 'a different kind' of human.
Thinking about what they go through makes you appreciate what you have.
The feelings that you feel, the hurt, the laughter, the pain, the joy.
Everything.
Doesn't it?

Life may not be all you want it to be, but at least you can be happy..
Mum always tells me, happiness is not something that happens. It's something you choose to be. You may be at depression but you can still choose to be happy, choose not for those things to bring you down.
Hey! Don't bring me down. :)

Appreciate what you have.
Eventhough at times, it seems to be the hardest thing to do.

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

And then there's the thought of how I find myself struggling to keep my calm, and to extend more tolerance. I try, with every fibre in me to keep breathing and just be cool about things, but sometimes it just fails me. And it's disappointing. Today really was just a day where everything was in place for me to blow my top. Talk about a serious need for zen.

I'm sorry then. I'm sorry that I cared. When all you say is that no one does. You want to be forever alone?! cause you keep saying that. You keep saying you have no friends. Well I'm sorry, but now I have my own problems to deal with, and technically they're bigger than yours.

Looking at life from a different perspective

You say you know me. Hmph, you never did.
Look through my eyes,see as I see,do as I do,be as I be,walk in my shoes and hurt your feet,then know why I'm like I am.

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

 

I have tattoos, so I'm a trouble maker. I have curves, so I'm fat. If I wear makeup, I'm fake. If I say what I think, I'm a bitch. If I cry some times, I'm a drama queen. If I have guy friends, I'm a slut. If I stand up for myself, I'm mouthy. Seems like you can't do anything now a days without being labeled. If I don't laugh at things, I'm emo. So what, go ahead and label me, see if I give a crap.

Today
I was approached by a homeless man who asked if i had any change
I only had two dimes, but i gave it to him anyways. As i watched him walk away, he put the dimes in someone's expired parking meter
Someone who can't afford to feed himself but helps others. 

 

My friend sent me that, and said that it has happened to him and a few of his friends. It's also a like on FB.

This gave me hope. :)

Thanks man. 

This thing against 'sticky'.
There's no point to it, is there?
What has she done to us?
Pfft... Don't answer that question.
But yeah, if they want to be BFFFFL,
We should just let them.
No one gave us the right to choose her friends.
Oh well.
I know 'sticky' can get very sticky and annoying.
But yeah,
the bird has to fly from the nest.
Or whatever shit.

I guess, I know what the victim felt when we did those things.
I only now realize.
Aish.
It's stupid really, if you think back on it now.
Oh well.
Better late than never.

Time to start making friends.


STOP HATING AND START LOVING :D
-drunken words are sober thoughts-