Life has its up's and downs, just a matter of how you take it. 
You get all emotional and tense about it? 
you go with the flow of things?
Or You think about it, yet choose to not get caught up in it?
I chose to go with the flow.
It sometimes hurts, but well doesn't everything to everyone?

Others though, got too caught up in it. Too caught up in my life.
People know that my days may be numbered.
But you don't have to remind me everyday, I do what I do to forget.
Not for you to remind me.
Not like I wouldn't remember the fact that I'm dying.

Though, I can't seem to make sense of what difference would it make?
Inside, I died at birth. 
I may be breathing, but I'm not breathing.
Feeling but not knowing what emotions are.
Thinking yet without a concience.

Ironic isn't it?
Trying to save a life, that doesn't want saving.
I'm not saying i want to die.
I'm saying that I'm not afraid of death.

Ironic isn't it?
That when word gets out that one person is dying, everyone else seems to reveal a deep dark secret that they're dying too.
Just proves that everyone, including me. 
We're all selfish in different ways.
We all lie.
We all have secrets.
We all feel uncared for, though the people closest to us care.
We all have made mistakes.
We've all felt like there couldn't be anything worse.


Truth is, no matter what happens....
There's always someone who's got it better, and someone who's got it worse.
Be grateful for that, even though It may just be the bitter truth.

If the world ended today, would you be proud of yourself?

sayonara,

M .

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

Lesson of the day. -drunken words are sober thoughts-

“Life lives, life dies. Life laughs, life cries. Life gives up and life tries. But life looks different through everyone's eyes.”

Now that some people know.
People are starting to act differently.
People I once knew oh-so well, don't tell me things anymore, in fact you seem to barely talk to me.
You keep saying no one cares.
So why the hell do you think I stayed back those days?
I could have caught some sleep if I just went home cause I didnt care.
I may not care, but I care.
You get me?!
you dont. no one does.

I've tried. I really have.
You just don't know how it feels like.
To feel like a plastic bag, drifting through the wind, wanting to start again.
You don't know how it feels like being me.

Promises mean everything when you're little,And the worlds so big.

I miss those days. I really do. When no one knew anything. But now people know, its getting worse. I just don't know what to do. If only grandma was here, she would give me a hug and tell me no matter what everything will be alright. Henry would just kick my ass and be all, your an idiot.

The times when life didn't seem so difficult.
You stopped telling me things. It just seems like to you, everythings a mess, to me everything was always a mess. At least, we live here, we have foood, we go to school right?
Unlike the less fortunate people, no food. no school.
That's what I try to think about all the time. How lucky I am.
But how lucky am I really?

Sometimes you just got to deal with it.
Deal with shit.
When shit happens, 
sometimes you get constipation. 
WhatamIcrapping?

It's hard to let my words out.
Sorry.

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

Now that some people know.
People are starting to act differently.
People I once knew oh-so well, don't tell me things anymore, in fact you seem to barely talk to me.
You keep saying no one cares.
So why the hell do you think I stayed back those days?
I could have caught some sleep if I just went home cause I didnt care.
I may not care, but I care.
You get me?!
you dont. no one does.

I've tried. I really have.
You just don't know how it feels like.
To feel like a plastic bag, drifting through the wind, wanting to start again.
You don't know how it feels like being me.

Promises mean everything when you're little,And the worlds so big.

I miss those days. I really do. When no one knew anything. But now people know, its getting worse. I just don't know what to do. If only grandma was here, she would give me a hug and tell me no matter what everything will be alright. Henry would just kick my ass and be all, your an idiot.

The times when life didn't seem so difficult.
You stopped telling me things. It just seems like to you, everythings a mess, to me everything was always a mess. At least, we live here, we have foood, we go to school right?
Unlike the less fortunate people, no food. no school.
That's what I try to think about all the time. How lucky I am.
But how lucky am I really?

Sometimes you just got to deal with it.
Deal with shit.
When shit happens, 
sometimes you get constipation. 
WhatamIcrapping?

It's hard to let my words out.
Sorry.

sayonara,

M .

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

Wrote a song. :)
-drunken words are sober thoughts-

I think I'm going to Private my blog. 
So only certain people can read.

I don't know why is it, that when people think about Pyshopaths or Sosiopaths or those kind of things, the words that go into their brains is,
-Insane
-Murderer
- Dangerous
- Person in those white pillowed room kinda of a thing.

Been researching on those kind of things lately.
Let's just say, they've caught my attention.
And leave it at that.
No questions asked.

These people are humans too you know.
They're just 'a different kind' of human.
Thinking about what they go through makes you appreciate what you have.
The feelings that you feel, the hurt, the laughter, the pain, the joy.
Everything.
Doesn't it?

Life may not be all you want it to be, but at least you can be happy..
Mum always tells me, happiness is not something that happens. It's something you choose to be. You may be at depression but you can still choose to be happy, choose not for those things to bring you down.
Hey! Don't bring me down. :)

Appreciate what you have.
Eventhough at times, it seems to be the hardest thing to do.

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

And then there's the thought of how I find myself struggling to keep my calm, and to extend more tolerance. I try, with every fibre in me to keep breathing and just be cool about things, but sometimes it just fails me. And it's disappointing. Today really was just a day where everything was in place for me to blow my top. Talk about a serious need for zen.

I'm sorry then. I'm sorry that I cared. When all you say is that no one does. You want to be forever alone?! cause you keep saying that. You keep saying you have no friends. Well I'm sorry, but now I have my own problems to deal with, and technically they're bigger than yours.

Looking at life from a different perspective

You say you know me. Hmph, you never did.
Look through my eyes,see as I see,do as I do,be as I be,walk in my shoes and hurt your feet,then know why I'm like I am.

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

 

I have tattoos, so I'm a trouble maker. I have curves, so I'm fat. If I wear makeup, I'm fake. If I say what I think, I'm a bitch. If I cry some times, I'm a drama queen. If I have guy friends, I'm a slut. If I stand up for myself, I'm mouthy. Seems like you can't do anything now a days without being labeled. If I don't laugh at things, I'm emo. So what, go ahead and label me, see if I give a crap.

Today
I was approached by a homeless man who asked if i had any change
I only had two dimes, but i gave it to him anyways. As i watched him walk away, he put the dimes in someone's expired parking meter
Someone who can't afford to feed himself but helps others. 

 

My friend sent me that, and said that it has happened to him and a few of his friends. It's also a like on FB.

This gave me hope. :)

Thanks man. 

This thing against 'sticky'.
There's no point to it, is there?
What has she done to us?
Pfft... Don't answer that question.
But yeah, if they want to be BFFFFL,
We should just let them.
No one gave us the right to choose her friends.
Oh well.
I know 'sticky' can get very sticky and annoying.
But yeah,
the bird has to fly from the nest.
Or whatever shit.

I guess, I know what the victim felt when we did those things.
I only now realize.
Aish.
It's stupid really, if you think back on it now.
Oh well.
Better late than never.

Time to start making friends.


STOP HATING AND START LOVING :D
-drunken words are sober thoughts-

Everybody Is Someone Else's Secret.

I miss those idiots.
Their pictures are all over tumblr.
Stupeed people.
Hahaha.
I saw my picture on some random person's Tumblr.
And It got reblogged, 57 times.
Whattheheck?
Weird....
-drunken words are sober thoughts-

I trusted you last year. Only to find out that I misplaced my trust, this year. I wish I had known earlier.

What do you do, once your secret gets out?!
Damn.
No mood to talk. at all.
I'm going ignore all this shit. and sleep all these dissapointments off

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

So, 
Well.
Yeah.
I sprained my ankle today.
Nadiah, Nuryn and me were running our 9th round around the padang and then on the track.
There was a -insert bone cracking sound- that came from my ankle.
Everyone stopped and starred at my foot.
Then they said I probably should walk. 
Hell No. Semangat lari jap.
So I ran.... in burning pain. ( little bit only larh)
Then we just went on in life, they started poking my ankle and asking does it hurt.
I just starred at them, and they continued poking. Padahal, I wanted to belasah all 3 of those baboons.
So came home, then told the people here about it. 
Got scolded by Mel and Nick.
Then went to get a bandage and went to the doctors.... aish.
Then had tuition.
Then went to the studio and came home.
What happened to not walking so much?!.
Aish.

; why is it that everytime I just don't want to talk, everyone asks if im okay.
I promise you that I am going to ignore the people who ask me that.
It. ANNOYS me.

sayonara,

M .

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

April fools conversation.

Girl’s phone is ringing
Girl: Hello ?

Boy: Hey..
Girl: You okay ?
Boy: Meet me at the park.

They meet at the park.

Girl: Are you okay ?

Boy: Yeah..
Girl: Are you sure..?
Boy: As a matter of fact, I’m not. I’ve been sitting here for the past two years, to only see you get hurt by jerks. I’ve always been here for you, & I’m glad to be. But when I see you cry about guys that DON’T deserve you, I wonder “I could treat you so much better.” But, no. I’m not gonna force you to have feelings for me. I just wanted to let you know, that I’ll always be here. No. Matter. What.
Girl: …
Boy: What’s wrong ?
Girl: Nothing..
Boy: Nothing will be wrong from here on out, I promise. Just answer this question.
Girl: Yes ?
Boy: Will you be my girlfriend ?
Girl: What ? Please don’t pull an April Fools on me.
Boy: I’m not playing around, I asked you out on April 1st for a reason.
Girl: And that reason is ?
Boy: To show the world that my love for you isn’t a joke.

Titanium boys jiwangness.

Had a major headache yesterday,
My whole family just wouldnt leave me alone.
My brother kept playing football inside the freaking house,
My parents were on the phone.
My maid was yaking away.
When your sick, you want to be left alone.
But No, I had to be attacked with questions, then the phone was ringing.
Mum's friend called.
Apebendaentah.
I just shouted F$%^ you and went upstairs.
Lagilah, they know I'm sick and they can't leave me alone.
Then my bro, said he's gonna tell mum and dad, and my expression asked him "Do I Look Like I care?!"
So he told my parents, and my parents came upstairs and scolded me.
I swear I would have just belasahed them man.
But, they're my parents.
So once they left my room. I started punching the wall.
Then I went to sleep with a supper red fist.
Fist of Fury.
And through all this, that idiot was at the studio.
Haish.
Didn't even eat dinner, or lunch, or breakfast.
What A Day.

; Families are supposed to care. Mine, never did.

-drunken words are sober thoughts-

JJ's expression is so so OGHWPJHGWHGEGR.
YunHo so mean.....

:D