A friend of mine was feeling unloved for the past few years.
Anyone can relate?
-slowly raises hand-

anyway.
I was just reading Alya's blog.....and she was saying something about this Japanese movie, she watched.
It's like postman to heave.
Let me tell you people one thing!
Postman to Heaven is steaksauce.
Goddit? Okay yeah. cool.

So yeah, she was saying its a romance movie.
Something's wrong with everyones hormones this year - mumbles to self-
Anyway, so yeah. its called.....wait for it.......
-drumroll-

GHOST: In Your Arms Again

Frustration ;-

1. discouraging; causing annoyance or anger by excessive difficulty

So frustrated right now. Woke up today morning, fell down the stairs.
After my parents left for the office.
My maid started screaming at my brother and me.
It's the same routine everyday.
Only today, it took a turn for the worse.
sHE SCREAMED LOUDER.
DO YOU KNOW HOW ANNOYINH IT IS?!?!?!
then, my bro started screaming back.

Sayonara,

Mia ; I feel like murdering someone

You're beautiful; yet you say you're ugly.
You're the perfect weight; yet you say you're fat.
You're smart; yet you say you're stupid.
When I say "I love you"' you say "no I love you more."
When I know you're upset and ask whats wrong; you say "nothing" when clearly there is.
You think I'm crazy for saying the things I say; I think your the crazy one.

We have been drifting apart, if you havent noticed...
we have all gone our separate ways.
Its sad and yet frustrating

Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.

Feeling afraid, cold and lonely,
I long to tell you how I feel,
but you don’t want to hear me.
The pain for you is much too real.
Should I back away and build a wall
and block away how I feel?
Or, should I give you a call?
We both need some time to heal.

An echo fades into the night
as our friendship disappears.
How do I know what is right?
How can I ease my fears?
If I do call you again,
would the old wounds reappear?
I can’t stand to cause you pain.
Hurting you again is my worst fear!

Labels: Poems

Changed my blog template.....
Temporarily.
Till I finish editing me new one! :D
Woop Woop.
This one i sho gray though.....


Mia ; All I see is gray

I guess we took the next exit eh?.
Once Febuary started.....Change started.
Recess wasn't as fun as it used to be.
People weren't how they used to be.
Life wasn't how it used to be.
I guess we'll get used to it.

It's as if it's only the four of us left, the ones who stayed together.
Alya, Yen Fern, Sie Mone ane me.

Sad isn't it?.
Recess ain't fun anymore,
So Operation 101 is undergo.
Alya, you better come back from there fast.... :D
IMY

OPERATION 101
has officially begun....

"When I caught the mosquito, I felt like I just protected my wife."
		-SS501: Kim Hyunjoong

"I made a lot of adjustments. There is something that I want, but the stylist said “Given the circumstances now, won’t it better if you do something like instead?” So I ended up accepting his suggestion. Having long hair somewhat showed an even manlier charm." -SHINee: Taemin.  Jonhyun :- "When Taemin came back to the dorm with his new hair, it was so long, “Huh! Are we going with this hair?” It was so long. I thought he was a woman. He is so pretty… Hair was even swinging in the back… It was beautiful…Heh."

Yunho said that if he was not a member of TVXQ, he would have become a fan of Jaejoong.


When Yunho is asked which member he likes the most, he answers first with “I like all of them” but when he was forced to answer, he replied ” I like Jaejoong.”

“YH: I like them if they know how to cook.

YH: I like them with straight hair.

Q: Which one you scared more, ghosts or a girl who burns in anger?” “Both. I don’t have extrasensory perception but ghosts are chimeric so I’m scared. But a girl who burns with anger is also scary. There are some parts (of the anger) that men don’t understand about. So both of them are scary.
		-DBSK: Changmin.    Changmin :- "Chicken must all be eaten" Jaejoong:- *nodnodnodnod....smiles evily*

"I’m okay with multinational marriage, foreigners are also alright. Mixed blood babies are so pretty."
		-Super Junior: Leeteuk.

That is just scary..... 0.0

"It can’t be helped. I, Kim Heechul, was born to successfully make women fall in love with me. It’s not my fault. It’s not of my free will. My mother and father created this face!"

Heechul - SUJU

"Onew: *rolling backwards in Kids’ playground*
Minho: This is not Indiana Jones"

So, I’ve been thinking about this whole being happy thing, and I feel like people get lost when they think of happiness as a destination. We’re always thinking that someday we’ll be happy; we’ll get that car or that job or that person in our lives that will fix everything. But happiness is a mood, and it’s a condition, not a destination. It’s like being tired or hungry, it’s not permanent. It comes and goes, and that’s okay. And I feel like if people thought of it that way, they’d find happiness more often.

Editors Note :-

Won't be updating, well hopefully not. Till Thursday.
Exams are starting in 16 hours.....so my head needs to be in those books.....
Sayonara,

It's annoying, you know.
How people think they have had the worst life ever, and that the whole world needs to pity them.
Do you understand how much that annoys me?
Especially when your so emo and so lonely every freaking day.
Aish.
Then you refuse to let others know whats wrong, refuse to let others cheer you up.
Let me tell you what I've been through in the past MONTH. Just this month.
-My bestfriend died.
-I don't know who I am anymore
-Everything my parents say, have to have the words Australia or study in them
-I have no idea who to trust anymore.
-Everyone's emo.
-Not allowed to dance anymore.
-Oh and to top it all of, my friend died yesterday.

Through all of that, I'm hurting inside. But that doesn't stop me from smiling.
Who knows? Even though I hurt, maybe one of my smiles can make someone's day a teeny tiny bit better.
So SMILE, even though all you want to do is cry.

Sayonara,
Mia ; =D

Outside the station, she stands with her child on the side of the street, taking pictures of cars.

You think she's insane. Until, one day, you notice that she's taking pictures of the license plates of the cars her child gets into.

Because you look. But you do not see.

And she walks out the shop with bags full of cat food. You think she's some crazy cat lady until you find out, she has no cats.

Because you eat. But you do not taste.

It's been a while since their last album but he assures you, he's doing just fine these days, white flecks in his nostrils. Then he asks you if he can spend the night on your couch, even though it stinks.

Because you sniff. But you do not smell.

And they say "Just OK" when you ask them how school was. Then you wonder what they're hiding until you find their diary and the last entry reads "I wish you'd give me some privacy."

Because you listen. But you do not hear.

And they've got a bruise over their eye and you run the tips of your fingers over it and ask them how it happened. You believe them. Until it happens again.

Because you touch. But you do not feel.

And they walk past you everyday, one million stories, each waiting to be told. Waiting for you to ask.

Because you live. But very few, love.

 

	Sitting in the cinema, ready to watch the movie... and when its about to start........ BOOOOOM, Human giraffe sits in front of you         I just realized tomorrow is SATURDAY!!!

Why do You ignore the girl who is in Love with you, the one girl who know's you've done wrong plenty of times and still want's to be with you , the one girl who doesn't care what others say about you, the one girl who know's your completely wrong for her but still want's YOU, and only YOU, why do you ignore the girl who could really make you happy, the one that maybe deep down you know you truly love her too, Why won't you accept her. ~Scares the Hell outta you doesn't it?

Girl: Say im a man after everything i say...
Boy: Go on..
Girl: I went to the pub
Boy: im a man!
Girl: I met this girl
Boy: im a man!
Girl: i took her home
Boy: im a man!
Girl: I slept with her
Boy: Im a man!
Girl: She whispered in his ear..
Boy: im a man...

The biggest scars are unseen and unremembered, always from a smile you forgot long ago. We would never get anything done otherwise.

So lets take a break and go on a journey, Lets run to the stars and skip to the depths of the sea, Lets take pictures of nothing and post them in the clouds, Lets write a new song and sing it to the grass, Lets watch the rain fall and dance between the raindrops.



;I'm okay 

There I said It. I'm not okay. Happy? 
Yeah, I know. My acting very the pro kan?
He.He.He. 
I wasn't supposed to go to school today. But I did anyway. Why?
Cause I didn't want to go there either.
Everyone's so caught up in their own emo-ism. And I'm going around making them laugh like there's nothing wrong with me.
There sure is something wrong with me too.
Sometimes I think I care for others too much.
Watching Postman to Heaven again.


Mia ; dotdotdotdotdot
  

"I always knew looking back on the tears would make me laugh, but I never knew looking back on the laughs would make me cry."

 

Just had to, sorry, A cancer patient only has one wish, to get better. I know that 97% of formspringers will not post this as an anon question, but my friends will be the 3% that do! In honour of someone who has died or is fighting cancer.

Ask me anything

I can't think of anything to update now.
By the way, I semangat Green Hornet..
Theme colours for this year is.......Green + Black! :D

I Didn't fight with the human gang.
Who in the world told you this? Ahyo, just cause I don't rehat with them as much as I used to, doesn't mean that I fought with them or whatever. Ahyo, you people get your knickers in a twist over nothing.
Nonsense.
They still my brudders larr man. 
Have I ever mentioned that?
I mix around.a lot.
Mia;ze blender. :D

I'm never going to be good enough for anyone, am I?
Parents, they want you to be a smart, studios, good, sporty, fun kid. Who can get A's and 'succeed in life'
Friends, want you to always be there for them even when they arent there for you, they want you to listen to their problems, and blablablabla.
To me, I don't judge. You may be the worst person on earth, and i'd still call you friend.
If only the rest were like that.
Well, live with the fact that I'm not perfect. If you want perfection, I'm not good enough.
I'm never good enough.

I am currently downloading 14 videos at the same time, so don't blame me if the picture doesnt move.

Aisho. Kecoh betul.
I've always wondered why people just suddenly dissapear at ze moments you need them?
I just don't know what's going on nowadays. Going numb. 
I seem happy and blablabla to everyone. It's cause I dont want other people to be 'whatyoucallit' emo.
I'm not emo. I dont even know what emo is. 
-.-
Yosh, so jyeah. You wanna make people happy, but in the end, your the one who gets hurt no one else.
But I guess thats just life right?
Friends. Hmph.
The only think I can say is, they hurt you. some of them. most of them.
I dont know larrr.......


Funny thing is. NOBODY knows when I'm okay or not.
Imma win a Oscar Award with my acting! :D


I dont know what ish going on.anymore.
Who my friends are and who they are'nt.
Tell me!!!
D:
Whataya want from me ah, girl?
I dont care larrr, if she wants to write about me on her blog or FB or whatever, 
Let her larrr.....
I dont get whats ze big deal?


I'm always there for you, to be that shoulder you can cry on.
Why'd you always go to her?
I feel like a piece of paper being scrunched up and thrown to a corner now.
I dont get it, sure larr you guys are twins right, with the same 'obsession' and blablabla.
But....but. Aish nevermind.
I still remember when both of us were sad after that thing happened. We had each other. Ever since then, I went to you when I needed someone to talk to. But when I wanted to say something........no one ever listens. Plus, you had her anyway. You didnt need me right. So I went to other friends......it didnt feel the same. but yeah.
 I just dont know what to do anymore. Dont know who to go to anymore. Dont know who my friends are. I.just.dont.know. 
I'll always be here when you need me tho. Always been and always have. You have 'her' anyway.....whataya need me for?


"You're looking in the mirror but you don't see yourself anymore" 
That's the only way to say exactly how I feel. 
I guess it's another mid-teen crisis.
Sayonara,
Mia ; I miss me. But I cant remember me.

"I am the author of my life. Unfortunately, I am writing in pen and can’t erase my mistakes."

Though I call out 'I want to see you',
There's no response from you.

Maths. So hard when teacher explains, but when my tuition teacher explains, senang jer. What is wrong with the world? -scratch head-
I bled today. Entah larrr, first I got cuts on my arm, so that was bleeding. I didnt really bother, just wiped off the blood. Then tiba-tiba, during science, my nose started to bleed a lil.
My nose NEVER bleeds. weird.
Life is going downhill at the moment. Aisho.
I don't get it, people are just so annoying these days, why ah?
Or am I PMS-ing? Entah lar. It's just, they can get so annoying.
Till I feel like cekik-ing them,
For the people yang tak faham bahasa melayu reading this, cekik-ing is a mere action that can only happen when your not in a good mood and you wrap your hands around the victim's neck and start to stranggle them. :D

So yes, that is what 'cekik-ing' means. Anyway, I have no clue how to do maths, and it's first period tmrw. Learning is the only way you'll understand. mmmph.
How can people get so cruel all of a sudden?
I mean, you have friends right? Dont lar, ignore them and buat bodoh. (english : Don't ignore them and pretend they're not there)

I'm so used to speaking in Manglish. Sorry, new zealanders....I love you, but sometimes I'm just to lazy to type the meanings of words, so use google translate -bows-

Back to the point. Don't larr ignore them. Not nice, you know. It hurts they're feelings. No matter what, Do Not Ignore A Person, A Dog, A Cat, An Elephant, A Garbage Bin, A Wallet, A Pole?.
you. get. the. point.

Aish. So yeah. Don't ignore your friends. If you need some space, cakap jerr larrr.....they'll understand, and if they don't, at least they know that you need the space.
I just don't get it. Sometimes, when your not okay, it gets annoying how people ask
"Why ah?."
"Maria, why you not okay??"
"Why? Why? Why?. You better tell me"
"Why you not okay ah? Cheer up okay"
"Are you okay?"

It is just annoying. ANNOYING.
But sometimes, people want people to ask them why.
For me, i don't really bother. You ask or don't up to you larr.
All I know is, don't take it personally if I don't respond to whatever your saying.
It's cause, I look like I'm listening, but I'm not.

Labels: quotes

Labels: quotes

Why do people get angry over tiny things?
Learn the art of patience, it gets you further in life.
Like today for instance, I'm not trying to state anything, I'm just using it as an example.

Form 2's took our table during rehat. I dont why, but some people got their knickers in a twist.
Whatever larrr.
So yeah, these form 2's took our table while I was at the koperasi. Anyway, when I got to the canteen, they had already chased them off. Poor form 2's. So yeah, and one of them left their plate behind. -.-
So well, if you all didnt know. We get demerited if our table is dirty. So yeah, everyone started arguing about the plate. ITS JUST A PLATE. A PLATEE. You know P-L-A-T-E.
Anyway, so one of the form 2's accidentally left her bottle oon the table, and came back to get it. I think her name was Shalini. Entah lar. So yeah. And one of us, kept asking her to take the plate, and she got her knickers in a twist and said ; It's my friends plate, why are you asking me to take it?"
I already had a lot of things on my mind, so I just couldnt take the noise and all the arguing involved. so I told the person who asked Shalini to take the plate, to forget it. Then I pulak kena marah, whatever larr. When people are angry at you, don't retaliate, makes things worse. and I'm speaking from experience. So after the person was done arguing with me. I just walked away. I mean. If they're going to argue over a plate, might as well let them do it. So I left. I wanted to take the plate with me and just put it in that basin thing but yeah forgot to. So yeah, I ended up rehating with Damia, Mas, Sara and all. Damia and me were walking and talking to see cik Foo. Damia was talking to Cik Foo. I was doing the thing I do best, leaning against a wall, silently. And this group of form 1's came up to me and asked me if I was Maria Monash. I said yeah. Then they started talking about me, in front of me.
One of them said that In SSP, she looked up to the gang and me, cause we ruled the school. literally. We made our presence known. I dont know how that happened cause all we did was have fun.
Then another one said I was an all star player, she meant in sports. -.-
I dont know where that came from.
The rest said cause we were cool and I rocked at dancing and all that. I was just standing there and nodding. Then Cik Foo said "Maria. Since when you're so famous with the form 1's?"
Me: "uhhhhhhhh.............uhhhhhhh........don't know lar teacher."
Then she laughed and walked away.
0__________0

Then the day went on as its normal boring self.  A lot of form 1's came and asked me if I was me/ looked at my name tag and all, then whispered amongst themselves and walked away. A few made me take a picture with them. Most of them were from SSP, then I guess they just told they're friends or something. I dont know. I dont care either.

At around 2, Cynta, Adline and me went to amcorp to lepak. wasnt really fun. kinda boring. cause well I was thinking. as usual. aish. But there were fun parts here and there. I bought another pick! :D

Are'nt you supposed to live your life to the fullest?
Do whatever you want,
be who you want to be, dream big. and all that jazz ?????

If what you want to be is an idiot who only thinks about PMR, well that's up to you. It's just so annoying, how everyone is so caught up with PMR. It.is.very.the.annoying.
I am a lil bit worried about PMR. but I want to laugh, dance and be jolly too. not just study, tuition, study study, mann, isnt that boring and annoying?
Talk about other things people. Aisho.
Everything is so boring lately. Is everyone getting more and more mature or is it just me?
Aish.
Or maybe I'm still caught up with all the stuff running through my head that I dont notice the fun things in life?
I.dont.know.

There's so many things I want to say, but I'm just not the kind of person who shares.....
Truth is, sure I tell people secrets....but they're not really secrets, yet they're secrets. I tell them the secrets that I'm not that bothered about. The real secrets, I keep to myself.
Ever since I was a kid, I've built this wall around my heart, not to see if anyone cares to break it down. But just idk, to prevent myself from getting hurt.....again. Yes, I can't believe that I'm saying this on my blog, but yeah. I haven't emo-ed this year. It was my new year's resolution. I just get lost in thought, and don't feel like saying anything after. NOT EMO-ING.

PMD was so boring. Now back to studies and staying back. aishhh.
Well, you only have to put with this for one more year, Mia.

Mia ; . . . . .

My class is so quiet. I miss 2A. So boring mann, 3C. Aishh..... -.-
Nick and Leon gave me, you know that small cute plushy thing..... I think it's called a Domokun! So I have 3 now....
Thanks to you people! :D
Back to school.....and on the first day itself we got homework.
Teachers should be banned from giving us homework on the first day of school. Its. not. cool.
Alya and Yen Fern have stopped blogging.....
They're studying for PMR.
whatever.
Australia.....Australia....Australia.
The only thing I can think about now.
Seriously. Teachers should be banned from giving us homework.
Aisho.
I found all these french stuff in my room....so I made use of them. Wheee! :D
Nick's writting another song. -.-
again. -.-

Homework. Homework. Homework.
I haven't FB'd in ages. no internet. right now, I'm using my dad's office computer, illegally.
What time is it?
4.25pm.
Okay,
Aren't you hungry?
Have a strawberry.
They scare me.
Are'nt strawberries scary to you?

Everyones depressed. 2 people depressified my notebook. You know who you are..... -kenings kenings-
-sneeze-

Oh yeah, Happy New Year Ebbybody!!
teehee.....

Thick black pens are awesome. Thin ones too. Aren't they awesome?
:D
Oh, I bought this keychain with a panda on it.....
It's adorable. cause it looks hynotic.
Panda's are cool larrr people.
I named it. . . .
Okay I didnt name it. Who names a keychain?
-.-

Anyway, It's gonna rain. Perfect for sleeping.
Time to listen to songs.
Goodbye.

There's too much change going on everywhere.....and about 85% of it, is not good.....I repeat Not Good!. Aisshhhh......it was starting to piss me off when I found out that our classes changed.....aishh.... Adline and Lavynia and me were supposed to be in 3C, and eva and oli were s'posed to be in 3D. hahaha.....now Adline and me are in 3E, Lavynia and Cynta are in 3B. Sie Mone is 3A, Alya and Oli are in 3F. I'm not sure about the rest though......I don't give a damn what class I'm in......but sometimes change can get really annoying.....
Aishhh.....

Getting more and more emotionless day by day......

"The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your pocket" -MiaMo (c)

Christmas...it used to be such a tradition. But I guess traditions change as people change as the clock keeps ticking. Sad really. This christmas it took a toll on us all. The first christmas without Grandma and BJ.

I don't get it....
I don't get girls to be precise. Well most of em anyway.
So dramatic.
Holidays.....hmmmm.....well I've been the walking dead for about a month now....
Emotionless......not to say totally emotionless but about 80 percent of my 'emotions' are artificial.
Live with it, people.
Just not in the mood to be... ME.

I have to go. Today's the last performance. at Subang Parade, 7.30pm. Come watch!

When you have come to the edge Of all light that you know And are about to drop off into the darkness Of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or You will be taught to fly”

''Well, what a coincidence,' smiled the man. 'A dollar and eleven cents - the exact price of a miracle for little brothers.' He took her money in one hand and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said 'Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet your parents. Let's see if I have the miracle you need.' That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specializing in neuro-surgery. The operation was completed free of charge and it wasn't long until Andrew was home again and doing well. Mom and Dad were happily talking about the chain of events that had led them to this place.  'That surgery,' her Mom whispered. 'was a real miracle. I wonder how much it would have cost?' Tess smiled. She knew exactly how much a miracle cost ... one dollar and eleven cents ... plus the faith of a little child.

Source :  Sofea Ghani